Saturday, January 17, 2009

The Present of Presence


What better gift can you give to yourself and everyone else than the present of presence?

A few years back, I was driving my daughter and I to Washington DC. It's a 5 hour trip from where I live. Two hours into the drive it hit me! I left the coffee maker on back home!!!! It was one of those older coffeemakers that didn't turn itself off after a certain time frame. Suddenly, my relaxing get-away was filled with fearful illusions of the house being burnt to a cinder by the time I returned home.


I turned the car around and headed home because when weighing the options, there were none. I had to do what I could to fix my oversight. It was either face the consequences or complete the trip to DC and be in endless stress thinking about having a smoldering cinder of a home to return to after the trip.


To make a long story short....when we got home...the coffee pot was in the dishwasher ready to be washed! Did I feel stupid? Yes! BUT! Whenever we go through a crisis or uncomfortable situation....it's not all negative. It's not a reason to endlessly beat ourselves up. I do believe in feeling the pain or grief in a situation and not avoiding it. But then, there's a time frame on feeling your feelings. Then it's time to rise above them.


After our pitstop at home, we got back in the car and made our way to DC. The whole drive, instead of beating myself up, I thought about an Eckhart Tolle philosophy. BE PRESENT. Had I been present when I turned off the coffee maker and put the coffee carafe in the dishwasher it would've saved a lot of time and energy. And yes, I could've left a key with a neighbor like most people do....that's a whole other blog entry to go into later.


What was the real lesson here? Awareness. This brings me to a universal issue....


I watch the behavioral trends of the eras and find them so entertaining. In this century, the way of the world is to multi-task, do too many things at once, have this techno gadget and that one. A lot is expected of us and we can't do enough or be enough...often resulting in burn-out and illness. There is little time for silence and presence. When I ask clients to schedule in some nothing time....some rebel, feeling it would be a waste of time because nothing is getting done. But, nothing time is for presence. It's the exact silence and time stand-still needed for hearing the wisdom within! It's a required part of the balance of life.


Had I been present when cleaning up the coffee maker and not allowing my mind to be in the future, going over all my packing plans for the trip, I would've been aware of what I was doing in the moment.


How is this a huger lesson? Eckhart Tolle suggests we get so present when we are in our daily situations that we are aware of every cell of our being engaged in each action. This makes doing dishes a Zen experience!!!! Instead of dish-washing being a drudgery...or even toilet scrubbing....it's an experience of feeling every cell of your body engaged in action! Good writers and speakers know to utilize all their senses when describing their story. Why don't we all live this way? This certainly was something overlooked in the school system. To be present.


I believe this recession is bringing awareness to what is not working in our lives. A lot of the traditional ways of doing things are starving for change! Painful situations always get our attention and that is exactly what the recession is doing...opening our awareness to being creative and making our lives work for us. There is no one cookie cutter way to do things. That mentality just isn't working. Awareness is the first step to change. We are now personalizing the way we live our lives because we were each created to do things in our own unique way to make the world a better place. If we could all start by honoring ourselves, being deeply present in each thing we do, then life becomes an entertaining adventure. We would love and appreciate...even being totally present in cleaning a coffee carafe!


As a coachsultant, I support my clients to stand strong in honoring their unique gifts. I adore watching my clients get excited about discovering how powerful and important their life journey truly is! Each one of us is vitally important. That's why we were chosen to exist! It's not just the celebrities or the famous who are important. It's each one of us. I know some incredible people who couldn't give a *#&*%* about fame and fortune. These are my heros.


A first step to having a life you love is to be present and aware in the moment. So, give yourself the present of presence. Try doing all you do with every cell of your body. Feel every sense in all you do. Experience how life was truly meant to be lived! There are a lot of people out there doing more more more to fit in with the trend of society to focus on too many things at a time and not give quality time to any one thing. These people are truly missing out on the simple and absolutely free of charge (a true bargain during a recession!) awareness of being totally present.


By the way, the trip in DC turned out to be better than ever because we both decided to be totally present in all we did, so it was a sensual and vivid experience. We even understood the confusing subway system by remaining present. Message injested, lesson learned!


Your assignment, should you choose to accept it, is to take out a block of time to be totally present in even the most mundane of chores. Then come back here and let us know how that felt. Share with us your gift of presence!